Week 2 of my Isagenix journey has me wondering if I’m one of those “one and done” kinda girls.

Not sure what you’re reading? Check out Giving in instead of giving up: An Isagenix journey, where I confess to buying into this system. But if you read that and follow my social accounts, you already know my journey began all sunshine and roses.

That’s over. Now I’m in Week 2. And It’s not perfect.

What happened, you ask? Someone gave me a compliment.

Yes. It’s that simple.

I was ROCKING this thing. I did a two-day cleanse after my first two shake days and completed Day 2 while on the road for a hockey game. I resisted the most delicious pizza on earth (Barro’s Pizza in Phoenix) and In-N-Out Burger later that night.

I felt good. Not really even hungry while cleansing. And I started out the next week ready to conquer the world.

But then someone complimented me.

“You look amazing. Like you’ve lost weight…like, a lot of weight.”

I explained how I was trying this “system,” and said how I was only in my second week. She gasped with a “You’ve only been doing this for TWO WEEKS?!?” and rather than clarify with a “No, actually…only five days…” I simply nodded. And she gushed. Told me how amazing I looked and that I shouldn’t care if I was using a system because it was clearly working for me.

Apparently, I must have subconsciously processed the conversation as “If it’s working this well, I clearly have room to cheat…”

And so when I picked up my darling children Taco Bell on the way home, I also picked up some for myself.

I could have been decent. Stuck to a couple hard shell tacos and stayed in my calorie limits – but if you’re gonna cheat…cheat. So I had two soft tacos and a Mexican Pizza.

What. The. Hell.

And then it was Valentine’s Day.

As a society, we do way too much “rewarding” and “treating” through food. And I’m usually first in line.

Valentine’s Day is actually sort of mysterious in that history isn’t completely sure which saint it’s honoring. There are three St. Valentine’s in history with two martyred for activities related with romance (one continuing to perform marriages when it was banned in ancient Rome and one for apparently finding love with the jailor’s daughter). Regardless – nothing historically relates to chocolate. We did that…because somewhere along the way we decided chocolates are romantic and now they’ve become a staple treat on this romantic holiday.

And because I am trying to walk this fine line of being healthy without being obsessed – especially in front of my 6yo daughter who has already cried because her tummy isn’t as small as Ariel’s – when she said “try my chocolate mommy,” I obliged.

And then I had another…and another….and so on and so forth.

Then the still ugly perfectionist in me said, “Messed up again, might as well go all in.”

And so yesterday I didn’t eat until about 1 p.m., RAVENOUS, and had no problem polishing off a Subway foot long and jalapeno kettle chips.

I could have stopped myself. I could have saved the day. I could have had my Isa snacks and a shake for dinner. But I didn’t. Instead, I ate a delicious dinner with my family and decided to just “start again,” with my 2nd Two-Day cleanse of the program (which started this morning).

I don’t want to be one and done. No – I will NOT be one and done.

This is the “jumpstart” to a lifelong change. And from this post, I’m sure you’re all counting the ways in which I NEED to change. Trust me…I’m aware of a lot of them (I think). But just as I’m being honest about this journey, please feel welcome to give me your honest advice based on what you’re reading.

Much Love – H

 

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